I struggle with self confidence. Like, not just a little. A lot. I wish I didn’t but I do. I always have. I probably always will. When challenges come up, my default is to question my ability, doubt myself, and flirt with quitting. It’s rarely to believe in myself, offer words of encouragement in the mirror, or give myself the loving kick in the pants to keep going.
Fortunately, I also have a secret weapon, a #1 “go to” when my confidence needs a boost.
I phone a friend. Or text one, or go see one. The way I reach out isn’t necessarily the important part, it’s the fact that I do. I reach out.
There is a famous quote which says, “When women support each other, incredible things happen.” I live this truth, and I bet you do, too. I am lucky enough to be surrounded by an amazing tribe of women. Some encourage me in my marriage, some in my parenting, others in my business, or my health, or just in life. Some are blood, some are lifelong friends.
If you’re a woman, I bet you’re nodding along with me now. You might relate to the self deprecating, insecurity and doubt. But I hope you also know the value of a good friend. Or even better, a tribe of them. It’s the secret behind every confident woman- or at least that’s how I see it. A woman with real confidence has a friend ready to beat her down if she puts out any of that insecure, self-deprecating garbage. Because a true friend, a true tribe, sees the value in you when you struggle to see it in yourself.
I’m so thankful that I discovered this secret weapon, and I hope with all my heart that I offer that back to my tribe.
I hope too, that my daughter finds her tribe. I know this will take a long time, perhaps a lifetime. But maybe it can start with me.
Of course, to survive life with my teen daughter, I’m going to need my girlfriends now more than ever!
So let me ask you- do you have that secret weapon? When self doubt hits, who do you turn to? Share this with her and make sure she knows how important she is to you.
Remember, “individually we are one drop, but together we are an ocean".
Oh, and if you don’t have a tribe, come join mine. There’s always room.