What Am I Doing?
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By Jennifer Lebo
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Something is changing.  I can feel it.  

Every morning, I sit down to write, and nothing comes out.  I mean nothing.  Nada.  Zilch.  Writing blog posts is becoming less fun and more challenging.  It used to be something I looked forward to, something that poured out of me.  Now, I find myself looking at a blank computer screen day after day.

I've been wondering what has changed.  

So I've been doing a little digging.  

First I went to my blog.  I checked out the numbers.  Did a little research.  I took a look at what blog posts get the most views.  What do people enjoy reading from me?  I discovered that it was my personal blog posts that were most read.  The ones about my own children, my own struggles, my own journey.  These are my most read blog posts.


Now, before I say anything else, let me just clarify that I know this is not because my life is so interesting or dramatic.  Far from it.  I'm a wife, and a mom of three kids, doing some photography work on the side, trying (and way too often failing) to keep my ducks in a row.  This is not very different than most of the women I know who are reading this blog.

So what is it then, that makes these blog posts more popular?  I'm not 100% sure, but I might have an idea.  More on that in a bit.

But first, let's go back to my searching.  After I searched through the numbers, I did some searching internally, because this is where I seem most stuck.

As I said earlier, I would spend day after day staring at a blank computer screen, or rewriting that one task on my "to do" list- WRITE BLOG POST.  What was it that was making this task so difficult all of a sudden?  I found myself doodling over and over, "What do I want to write about?"


I think this is where I'm getting stuck.

Like all of you, my life is not about one thing.  I'm a wife, a mom, a photographer, a friend, a woman, a Christian, an American, a liberal.  And on any given day, all of those things determine how I live my  life.  

But what does this have to do with my blog?  

As I said earlier, I know that my life is not overflowing with intrigue and drama.  I know that's not why women are more drawn to my personal blog posts.  I believe it has more to do with who we are as women.  We are all complex creatures.  We all have loved ones, jobs, personal interests, points of view on everything from sports, to politics, to faith and religion.  We all struggle to keep our ducks in a row.  So we are drawn to others who understand us.

I believe I have been struggling with my blog lately, because I'm less interested in writing about the basics of photography, and more drawn to writing about things that matter today.  The struggles of parenting, the questions I have about my faith and my country, the overwhelming desire I have to help those around me who need so much help.  My heart wants to focus on people.  Whether those people are my kids, my husband, my friends, my family, or whether those people are people in my community whom I've never met, those who need someone to stand with them.  Well, that's where my heart is focusing.

I have always felt that this blog was an extension of my business.  Teach moms how to take better photos of their kids.  Show women how to prepare for portrait sessions.  Discuss the basics of photography.  

Perhaps it still is.  I don't know.

And so I'm asking for your help.  Please!

Before I spend another day staring at a blank screen, I'd like to ask for your input.  After all, it's you who read these posts.  So tell me...

Do you prefer the tutorials of photography?

Or would you rather read about life?  My life?  How perhaps it relates to your life?  

The statistics seem to show me that you prefer the latter.  But the blog that I created was initially intended for the former.  On the other hand, I love sharing my stories, and taking you on my journey through life.  Still, it is my photography that I believe can help me reach out to serve others.

So what am I doing?  

I'm not sure yet.  And I apologize for taking you on this carousel of a blog post.  The question is still there.  What do I want to write about?  What do you want to read about?  How can my words help others?  How can I reach others?  Who is my audience?  Who are you?  How can we connect?


I would love to hear from you.  Please consider commenting below to share what you enjoy about this blog.  I want to write for both of us! 


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1 Comment
Ann - Are these things mutually exclusive? I read because I am curious to hear what you have to say on any topic. I think we are drawn to others' struggles because we are all trying to figure it out, too. You understand that, I know. I am happy to hear about it all and don't need you to be just one thing. I am also, I acknowledge, not a planner and more a free-flowing - take-me-where-the-wind-blows kind of person and I know others will crave the need to know what to expect. While I celebrate your successes along with you, I am more drawn to the drama of trying to figure out this life we live because that's where I live each day.
I also love to see your pictures. I love the ones of the folks I know the best, of course, but I love seeing the pictures. Keep 'em coming!